i won't start doing things, unless everything is perfect and ready to go
i am scared of my own capacity; i am not scared of failure, i am scared of success
when people know your ability and capacity, YES there is pressure to be fabulous
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
~SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI~ akuadaplanbisuk,jadinya akuiski...
...bersambung
Dariah; 10:39 PM
now i can sleep in peace
after finding all the reasons why i want to buy high heels, i decided to go crazy today.
so yeah, three pairs... hehehe want to know what were my reasons behind my action?
1. high heels are only out for summer. next semester will be my last semester meaning this is my last summer here. during winter, it will be all about boots. i have my boots, now its time for sexy high heels~
2. it is redicolously hard to find high heel in Brunei. sandle yes, but not shoes
3. high heels give me a sense of confident and control
4. i want to get them out of my mind and get them onto my feet. hehe
5. i want to celebrate my hard work
6. hehehe.. i am just making this up as i go.....
all in all, i don't have to explain myself... once i fall inlove, i am possessed.
Dariah; 12:37 PM
Monday, September 29, 2008
man, last week was just the longest week ever. last week was the week after study break.. and by Sunday, i was like "this is still the week after study break"
and my posts were just depressing was it not? it is time to move on.. why? i am going to buy me some pair of shoes!!! i am going to buy my stress away~ which shoes am i talking about? hehehe the ones i talked about last week. i was obsessing about it this morning and yes MUST.BUY.THEM.
Dariah; 5:05 PM
Sunday, September 28, 2008
at our lowest point, at our weakest performance people just like to smash us harder.. shouting out how shit we are...
pointing out what is lacking or telling what the problems are could turn out to be a solution.
however if this harsh comments going on for a long period of time, every brick of confidence would break each time and eventually had none left
with no confidence, we couldn't tell ourselves that we've done a good job. who would tell us that we have improved since all other people could think of is pointing the shit out of us?
di manakah hilangnya Dahriah yang dulu? ke manakah hilang Dahriah yang periang, peramah, Dahriah yang tabah mengharungi segala rintangan hidup? Dahriah yang tidak hirau akan segala caci maki dari orang di sekelilingnya? Dahriah yang selalu berfikiran terbuka dan positif? Dahriah yang selalu berkeyakinan tinggi?
...seandainya, aku sendiri pun tidak tahu...
there i was, dashed out of class shedding tears again
Dariah; 2:17 PM
Dariah; 2:31 AM
Friday, September 26, 2008
They can say anything they want to say Try to bring me down But I will not allow Anyone to succeed Hanging clouds over me And they can try hard to make me feel That I don't matter at all But I refuse to fall Doing what I believe Or lose faith in my dreams
'Cause there's a light in me That shines brightly They can try But they can't take that away from me From me They, they can't do anything they want to you If you let them in But they won't ever win If you cling to your pride And just push them aside See I, i have learned there's an inner peace I own Something in my soul That they cannot possess So I won't be afraid And the darkness will fade
They can't take this Precious love I'll always have inside me Certainly God will guide me Where I need to go
They can't say anything they want to say Try to bring me down But I won't face the ground I will rise steadily Sailing out of their reach
Dariah; 11:14 PM
was planning to dine out with Ron and friends tonight but got cancelled. but i still wanted to go out so i went to city by myself.
tried on few tops, didn't like 'em.. then i went into Betts, shoe store. i felt IN LOVE with a couple pair of shoes. they are really expensive though.. so i didn't buy them. it was really hard to walk away. normally if i fell inlove with something i would be possessed.
at the moment there i felt like shopping for raya.
...then i realised it was not worth the fuss
Dariah; 9:54 PM
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Dariah; 3:09 AM
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Happy 32nd birthday sis Dahlia...
and happy teacher's day!!!
Dariah; 10:24 PM
former SMJA principal once said, "someone told me, every step he walked into the library, thousands of knowledge he received"...
that's how i feel walking into the library today. with an ease mind, i walk in. i've looked the codes of the books online beforehand. whatever books i wish to find, i could find it there...
maybe, just maybe... the resources i have here, i couldn't find it in Brunei...
so, alhamdulillah... i've given the chance to study abroad...
Dariah; 11:38 AM
Monday, September 22, 2008
when i look up to the sky... my mind ponders and ponders...
people always say, sky is the limit... reach for the sky, if you fall at least there are clouds to fall onto..
what if the sky is clear? how can we take risks when there is nothing (no cloud) to save us?
i pondered. when i was in Brunei, i accepted every challenge i was given, look for any opportunities and chances for self-improvement. because when i look up... i could reach the sky... i feel secure... safe...
then, when i'm here in Perth, looking at the sky just frightens me, it was a clear sky... i was afraid, i want to run away and find closure.
then my mind pondered again. tried to interpret further what i just thought. when i see the clouds, i see my family and friends, the people who will back me up whenever i am in trouble, the people who willingly gave me a hand whenever i ask for help. who loves me unconditionally. so, when i see no clouds, my heart shrinks. somehow i feel weakened to the bones.. i couldn't walk with chin up and chest high...
...all these just by looking up to the sky... now, when you look up to the sky, tell me what do you see?...
Dariah; 9:42 PM
Sunday, September 21, 2008
at 3.30pm today, i officially hadn't not sleep for 24hours..
... i napped about 30minutes during lunch time, but that was it.. woken up few times.. so, was that considered a nap? or just resting my eyes? hehe
anyho... i'm still not asleep...that makes it 25.. hehe..
Dariah; 4:20 PM
Saturday, September 20, 2008
i was reading my cousin's blog, she mentioned about her homework and got stuck in some part.
it got me thinking...
if i have a little sister or brother, i would love to help them with their homework. sit with them, study with them... so nice... especially if they ask me about maths.. man, i used to get so excited when it comes to doing maths homework. hehe...
this makes me miss my nieces and nephews. since i am the youngest in my family, my nieces and nephews always look up to me and see me as a good example...
this is so random~ does this mean that i have a heart to be a teacher?... nothing against teaching, i enjoy teaching. i tutored several classes before i started my degree. i like my students, they are so fun to teach... few of them are good friends of mine :)
...seriously, this is so random.. haha...
Dariah; 8:02 PM
it started with a big-squared sticky note. yellow in colour.
then, the size gets smaller then, it comes with different colours
now, you will find them in different shapes
Dariah; 6:54 PM
this is the state of my desk at the moment.
how or where am i suppose to study?
jeng jeng jenggg~~
haha..
Dariah; 1:51 AM
Thursday, September 18, 2008
hehe.. was crossing the road and i saw this
Dariah; 11:21 PM
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
it is hard to focus on doing one thing when other few hundreds things in your lists are buzzing from the back of your mind.
for coaching psychology unit, i have to coach two clients (peers outside uni); one on her sport performance, the other on her health-related issue.
coaching people it is not as easy as asking them what they want to improve and expect yourself to know/understand what they were talking about. say, if you are just a psychology student and you have an athlete and she wants to improve her netball skills. this psyc student won't know the language of this athlete would use. so it would be hard for the coach to even tackle her client's issue.
in my case, it is similar to that. my niche is weight lose, toning and strengthening, i absolutely have no idea on sport conditioning or team-sport performance. so i have to do some research prior to the coaching-session.
...keep a cool head, make it work~...
Dariah; 1:52 AM
Sunday, September 14, 2008
dinner was dissapointing, and i just couldn't take them for Sahur tomorrow before dawn. so i decided to go to Ararat to buy my favourite kebab. it was so cold and dark outside. i was sad too. felt so lonely during Ramadhan. i really couldn't spend time chilling with my malay friends here due to seas of work i have. furthermore, going back to my room, being alone doesn't make me feel better either.
as i was going to Ararat, my journey was lightened
i feel protected and blessed to have a full moon today to guide my way.
Dariah; 9:23 PM
Saturday, September 13, 2008
my day feels so slow. i thought today was Sunday or Monday. last Thursday, i woke up at 9am and slept at 5.15am the next day. man, that was 20 hours of being awake. no wonder i feel like few days ahead. at least i wake up at 3pm today. gosh my study break is really really packed. i have at least 3 things do to each day.
...sometimes i wonder, is this the vision of the future?...
Dariah; 11:31 PM
Friday, September 12, 2008
...this is the time when
at least 10 things run across my mind in one minute
my fingers kept tapping the tables, thinking of which assignments or units i should catch up first
my head questioning, trying to find people to coach for my project
my heart beats miles per minutes
....anyho.. happy study break guys.. hahaha~
Dariah; 5:25 AM
Monday, September 08, 2008
i am going to run a tutorial session on Wednesday. i have to write a page summary on Finger Movements and Intrinsic muscles of the hand.
... an illusion of 'a page summary' it is quite a challenge to summarize deep muscles of the hands and movements of the fingers into one page. so i decided to create two small booklet attached on A4 paper. booklet on top contains pictures of the bones and muscles, and the booklet underneath it is its brief description. i divided each booklet into four divisions. so when i refer to page one, it refers to page one of both booklets.. handy huh?
oh yes i have to make 8 copies plus 2 backup copies for my classmates.
Dariah; 10:25 PM
thinking of my week 7 is going to be full-on. whenever people spotted me, i would always have something to read or in the process of gathering information.
people around me who cares, asked what was going on? then, i told them about my suffocating week ahead of me. one person asked me "...but you are on top of it right?"
it makes me realised that, 'yeah' i am on top of it. i've been preparing for it weeks ago and i have everything scheduled.
other people patted me on the back and said "... i couldn't do it if i were you..."
my Arifin also told me to take baby steps.. and i will get things done.
my parents believe in me and so as other people who care about me. i know they always do and and it feels so much better when they verbalized it...
...because once a while, it is nice to be reminded
Dariah; 12:35 PM
Saturday, September 06, 2008
week 6 is about to end and it has been crazy, preparing for week 7 to come.
lots of things due in week 7.
1. run a seminar and workshop (coaching psychology) 2. run an Anatomy Tutorial 3. Anatomy test 4. Bioenergetics assignment 5. Coaching two friends (coaching psychology) - first session
Dariah; 12:47 PM
Wednesday, September 03, 2008
one day, we have to partner up to do an activity called "trust". so i approached this lady to be my partner. she simply said "no, i don't trust you"
on the same day, we have to write an exercise program and train one person. i approached another girl in the class, she said "no, i want to be trained by her".
...nothing to add...
Dariah; 12:02 AM
Monday, September 01, 2008
Selamat Menyambut Bulan Ramadhan, Selamat Berpuasa keluargaku & kawan2ku semua~
ehem-ehem...
watch my latest drama Perjalanan
Ch: RTB 2 Time: 9.30 am (yes in the morning) Date: 1st - 13th September (everyday!!!)
that means, including Fridays and Sundays, so better catch few of 'em at least~~
Dariah; 1:18 PM
Bits & Pieces
Dariah 24
Leo Bruneian Sport Scientist
Fitness Enthusiast
PE Teacher
Inspired by everyone
A concise perfectionist
Always finishes everything she started
Things That Never Change
i love my husband
i love my family
i love my bestfriend
i love my cats
punctual, very
hates waiting